Will I Be Pretty?…or Will I Be Pretty Amazing?
Today, like every other day,
we wake up empty
and frightened.
Don’t open the door to the study and begin reading.
Take down a musical instrument.
Let the beauty we love be what we do.
There are hundreds of ways to kneel and
kiss the ground.
~ Rumi
I start with this Rumi poem for several reasons. First it reminds me of what to remember as I wake up each morning with new possibility arising within a very big shift in my life. It also speaks to me of the beauty that resides within and without each of us, and the myriad of ways that we can express this within our own uniqueness.
As women we have often listened to others dictates about what is right or wrong with us – especially our appearance – and followed the voices of others whims and desires. If you are like me, you have also wanted to fit in within the “appearance” that you were blessed to have been born with…but may have been continuously displeased with – attempting to change somehow to fit in with what “beauty” or “acceptable” appearance is in your particular culture.
This not only speaks to external appearance, but the “beauty” that we share inside of us 
offered as gifts of full expression. This beauty that we seek to understand our entire lives may have been held back from full expression by fear of being misunderstood, not being accepted in the constraints of cultural bias, or perhaps even punished in some form.
In my global travels I have found this to be true universally. What is it that has us judge our appearance, inside and out, set apart from recognition of our heart and souls dream for who we are to become this lifetime?
This past week I was blessed to make contact with a woman at the gym after my swim. She approached me, and what resulted was a short but very profound sharing between two older women that are committed to bringing the fullness of who they are out into the world.
Martha is an artist -a full time one at that. The glow that radiated from her as she talked about her art gave me encouragement and inspiration to bring my own without the hesitation that has self sabotaged me in the past.
Yet, I learned that it was not until she was in college that she dove into the potential of the art within her. Her mother did not want her to be an artist when she was growing up. It was OK for her sister to be one, but mom wanted Martha to be an dancer. With the freedom that comes from leaving home, Martha started to explore her own beauty within the world of visual art. She now gives herself permission to bring this to the world as her gift.
This week I also bought a new bathing suit as the old one had such thin material from frequent use that it was bordering on embarrassingly revealing. When I got it home I tried it on for the first time and realized that it was a tad too small – but not much.
As I gazed at the reflection in the mirror and turned and twisted to see all angles of my aging voluptuous (I love that word!) body I decided to see the beauty of having a body – a body that can swim, lift weights, hike, walk, ride bikes, make love, sit in meditation, run on the beach, play, laugh and breathe. A body and ageless “beauty” that can be expressed until the last breath is taken….full and complete acceptance of what is now.
Is it time for you to explore that inner and outer beauty…… to simply be the pretty amazing woman that you are? ! There are hundreds of ways to kneel and kiss the fullness of our expressions….
Here is a powerful video by Katie Makkai filmed at the 2002 National Poetry Slam. She brings a lot of emotion and wisdom to the question – Will I Be Pretty? Thank you to Karri Ingerson for this video!!
OTHER BLOGS BY GAYE ABBOTT:
www.DivineWealthJournal.com – Conversations between The Brit and The American
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